... Every once in a while, I like watching a television programme called Extreme Makeover: The Home Edition. It's the only "reality show" I watch. Unlike other reality shows that seem determined to highlight what is the worst and most shallow in this country, Extreme Makeover: The Home Edition is a programme that I think celebrates the best of America. It brings together hundreds, if not thousands, of volunteers in what would be termed the "gotong royong" spirit in Malaysia, working together to build beautiful new homes for people in need. If you haven't watched it and get a chance to, you should, because it shows America at its most helpful, most supportive, most heart-warming.
Every time I watch it, this programme makes the sappy part of me cry some happy tears because there is so much love and positive spirit in it. I wish more people could see this side of America, instead of the hate that seems to fill so much of your exchanges in person, online and in the print & electronic media. There is such hate and anger in the country these days, and I think it's threatening to take over everything else, presenting the ugly side of this country to the rest of the world. I find that sad, because I'd much rather see see the positive, innovative, loving, great side of this country. The side that used to make people dream of coming here because it seemed like paradise to them. You used to celebrate freedom and independence. Now ...
I realize you've been through a lot in the last nine years. First, the horror of 9/11. Then the economic depression and loss of jobs and homes. I understand the fear. I know it's driving a lot of the anger and hate. But are you really going to allow fear and despair get the better of you? Perhaps it's wrong of me, but I expected better from the country that is supposed to be the "leader of the free world". That seems to be just a tag line now, not a motto that you live by. How can you be driven by noble aspirations like freedom and love when you show fear and hate? How can you inspire others when you show the world intolerance?
How can you call yourself the United States of America when you seem so divided by beliefs and politics? Where is the unity? It's bad enough that a number of you hate or fear all Muslims because of acts committed by a small, extremist group of them. I think it's even worse that you seem to hate your fellow Americans. Political ads by the people you elect to lead you are hateful and unbelievably negative, but you seem to lap them up. Supposedly, you approve of these nasty ads and allow the negativity to guide your vote - polls show you are more swayed by negative than positive ads. I find that shocking.
Bullying in this country is at an all-time high, leading to an increasing number of suicides by young people, and you seem surprised by that. But why would you be when I see bullying all around me, in the things adult Americans say and write. You are leading by example, bullying and hurting people who don't agree with your views or politics. There is such venom in the things some Americans say and write. Is it any wonder children and teenagers are doing the same thing, saying hurtful things to each other via text messages and online? They are learning from from the adults.
The sad thing is that most Americans aren't like that, but as with everything else, it is the squeaky wheel that gets the oil, and the worst of you are getting the most attention, even though they are the minority. The America that others see is not an America to be proud of, and I think that is sad. The anti-Muslim sentiment in this country, even if it isn't widespread, is getting a lot of attention and is making those of us who have grown up in Muslim countries and have Muslim friends, even if we aren't Muslim ourselves, wonder about this country and where it really stands on important issues like tolerance and freedom of religion. The rudeness and intolerance exhibited by some Americans, including some of your politicians, makes some of us wonder if you really do deserve to be in a leadership position internationally. If you believe that Christianity is the only true religion, then shouldn't you as a nation behave in a way that inspires others and attracts them to your way of life and your religion rather than repelling then because of your hatred?
You elected a president based on the premise of change and then, in typical human behaviour, fought that change every step of the way. Or, you expected him to deliver everything you wanted on day one and then became disillusioned when change wasn't instantaneous. I wonder sometimes if you realize just how big your country is, how long it takes for change to actually be implemented and how many demands are made on a government that you expect to fix everything but you then insist is too big.
The most watched news channel on television is the least balanced and fair, despite what their tag line might proclaim, and seems to be filled with opinionated people determined to incite an uprising with calls to "take back America" while idealizing the way things used to be even though they weren't really ideal in the past. The top-selling newspaper in the country has as a weekly columnist the man who helped take America to war in 2002 for reasons that anyone not driven by fear and blind emotion knew was wrong. Are these the most watched station and most read newspaper for the same reason negative political ads hold more sway? Do the majority of people really thrive more on the negative than the positive? That doesn't sound like the land of hope to me.
Thankfully there are also rational, intelligent, fair people with a voice to try to bring reasonable, balanced, calm debate to the table. They are not noisemakers or alarmists, so they are not heard by as many of the masses, but they are heard by enough and that gives me hope. Hope that you aren't so angry you lose sight of what a blessed country this is and how much you have going for you here, despite some setbacks. Hope that you will take a deep breath, especially at this time of year when the autumn colours are so beautiful and the air so crisp and fresh it makes you happy to be alive, and remember what America is supposed to stand for ... not hate, anger and raised voices but freedom, human rights and the courage to change, to move towards a brighter future instead of clinging to an idealistic past. Hope that the friendships all around this nation between people of different races, religions and political ideologies will triumph over fear, hate and ignorance.
Instead of "taking back America", what you should aspire to do is rebuild America as Extreme Makeover: The Home Edition rebuilds homes. Use your innovativeness, talent and creativity to build bridges between people and communities, focusing on what you have in common instead of what pulls you apart. Where you have differences, find common ground (like pride in your country) to bring you together. Be the America the rest of the world can look up to as the best there is, instead of one that makes people view you as prejudiced and narrow-minded. You are better than the pettiness and hate that fills the air. Be compassionate and filled with the desire to uplift others. Be Extreme Makeover: The National Edition. Be inspirational, and remind the rest of the world why it wanted to be like you.
Be the America that drew so many to your shores, filled with hopes and dreams. Be the land brave enough to allow true freedom of speech - the kind of freedom that lets you say what you want if you so desire but gives you pause so that you say things that will build up instead of tear down your fellow Americans, or makes you choose not to speak when it hurts or denigrates, because that is also a form of freedom.
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